Lyrics
People frequently ask me
God Forbid’ they state,
You’re quite the women guy,
what’s your key? ‘
Well,
You too could be swimmin’ in women
Afloat in seas of ovaries
But more importantly
Knowing whether behind those pretty eyes
You have diamond within the rough
Or colored contact lenses and a *whirling* rough striper known as diamond
Lets recreate the scene make think you’re at a dining dining table seat
Talking playfully to your waitress at your neighborhood spot to eat
Way underneath the apron,
maybeline,
scent of eggs and cheese,
bacon oil
she is a babe
and eight at least
you wish to push the bowl of quesadillas of this dining dining table and spread them angel’s wings,
but you cannot say something?
If you do not do well with women,
They offer prescribed drugs on television
May cause loss of appetite
Malnutrition,
Dizzy spells,
And various bells are ringing,
And this is where I can be found in and provide em just a little additional make it possible to get em
(You can not get)
The thing is self- self- self- confidence is vital to any situation
(inside her jeans)
We all have actually insecurities
So why don’t you grow your self- self- confidence regarding the insecurities of others
(However you do not)
Hey, she is going to *bonk* somebody
(Give a damn)
so just why maybe maybe not you.
The drunker you may be, the easier and simpler it really is to have set, nevertheless the harder it is always to *boink*
You may need to visualize exactly just what its this months
Whoever you have been think of
The girl during the Pizza Hut
Midgets,
Nuns,
what miss that is ever little was.
And with only a little hard work
A small luck
If you occur to provide enough
Maybe you will get it well.
Now a *boink* is meant become fun
Instant gratification, a roller coaster (whee! )
But no body would like to get stuck over and over,
Going home to your roller coaster
Its hard to view your programs,
And do your homework
And once the trip you rode is over
It’ll price significantly more than a roll of quarters
(You can not get)
Pull out
I discover how warm and good it feels
(In her jeans)
But its getting crowded circular here
Please, pull out
(However you don’t)
you want to stay with
You can avoid the face,
(Give a damn)
But not the abbreviation
Taking payments from your paycheck
You can do it, pull out if its not the one
Men have what I call a Columbus Complex’
Other individuals was here,
But we nevertheless wish to feel just like we discovered it
So never inform the amount that you done it with
Your summers in Columbia
once you had been young and done a lot of dumber sh*boing*
Rambunctious young ones!
Wait when it comes to 2nd date to cuff the wrists
Sponges, plastic gloves, and whips, oven mitts
Now a well trimmed individual area, that’ nice
But why’s she therefore prepared?
You do not assume
She never ever understands
When she might show somebody?
Now think of that before going constant,
or even at your own personal wedding.
(You can’t get)
If she actually is your girlfriend
Leave her alone together with your friends
(In her pants)
Now, I do not expect no virgin,
But allow em attempt to screw her
If she actually is flirting, or *sound of cartoon feet*
(However you don’t)
It will not work man,
Get rid of her
And grab yourself a brand new girlfriend
Remember,
(Give a damn)
The guaranteed exchange rate,
At this party she actually is an eight,
In the club a seven,
At my apartment a 10.
Environment dictates.
The after,
She may slip to a three
Cause some things are better just to lust for morning.
This conclude the introductory section of this God Forbid self-help collection
Hey, rest along with other races
Help out worldwide relations.
For further behavioral instructions, consult the strip club that is nearest, and/or alcohol shop
(whether it’s not the one you want
just overlook it)